Of pains and fears

Of pains and fears

I've been waiting all week for him to call. It's already Saturday and I still haven't heard from him. I promised myself that I would start to get not too attatched to him, but here I am still wishing that he would call.

Sigh... why am I still hurting? I liked the way I felt numb last week. But last night, I went to church to attend mass, and I prayed about us... and I couldn't help but cry again. I still am not yet prepared to lose him.

They say that love conquers all... if it really does, then why can't it conquer distance? And if love frees us from all the pain in life, then why am I hurting now? If we're not really meant to be, how can love take my pain away?

At twenty, I finally realized what love is, and what love is not.

I had finally managed to change my phone settings. My profile does not include our anniversary date anymore. Little by little, I know I can finally let him go. I just don't wanna hope too much. I am afraid of getting hurt again.

They say love casts out all fear... but all I have now are fears inside of me.